craving food freedom podcast ep 41 dating with disordered eating

Ep 41. Dating with Disordered Eating

Neurotic around food

When I first met my boyfriend, I must’ve looked like a neurotic mess.

Back then, I was so scared of being hungry, I always had a snack bag (a red mini reusable grocery bag) slung across my shoulder with unsalted almonds, dark chocolate and a honeycrisp apple. If you know me IRL, you know what that thing looks like, I’ve bought at least a half dozen over the years because it gets raggedy every year. 

Residual effects of disordered eating

I was so scared of getting too hungry and bingeing but I also looked like a nutcase.

Even making meals together, I was always SO ANTSY leading up to dinner during the prep phase because I was still so sensitive whenever I felt hungry, like patience would be at an all time 0 and I would snap at him for cutting the onions too slow.

What happened to my binges after being in a relationship?

During those first few years, my binges decreased significantly, something about having a partner and being in a relationship was so comforting and fulfilling that I didn’t need food to be in that role as much. I’ve learned this about myself, I’m at my worst with food when I’m lonely and bored. It’s an awful combination. 

Over the years, I’ve also developed new ways to occupy my time. This business for example (I’m a little obsessed with it, there’s always a never-ending to-do list which actually keeps my anxious brain busy), I have a dog that comforts me, and I have a partner that supports me. 

Tip for if you’re struggling with food

You don’t need to fling yourself into a relationship or get a dog to bring you comfort. But the question is, what brings you comfort? If it’s just the food, then of course it would be hard to stop bingeing. If food is the only comfort and you have to break up with it because it’s no longer serving you, there’s no safety net, that’s brutal.

What are you like in relationships?

How does your relationship with food look like when you’re alone or in a relationship? DM me on IG, would love to know! Also I’m nosy and love hearing about other peoples’ relationships.

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